Not sure I’m the person to be writing about managing anxiety with a stoma, sometimes I don’t feel like I’m managing it at all.
It comes in all kinds of waves: quadruple-checking you’ve packed your kit, making sure your bag isn’t leaking every time you nip to the toilet, worrying that it’ll make that loud noise when you least expect it.
What I will say about managing it is this, never feel alone with it. Anxiety is part of the journey for a lot of us, and it doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong.
A few things I’ve learned:
- Be super organised. Having spares, wipes, and whatever gives you peace of mind in your bag makes a big difference. It doesn’t stop the what ifs, but it helps you feel a little more in control.
- Know your limits. You don’t have to say yes to everything, especially in the early days. If something feels too much, it’s okay to say no.
- Find your people. Speaking to friends, family, or someone else in the stoma world about your anxieties really helps. It’s a relief to hear “me too” from someone who actually gets it.
- Give yourself permission to rest. Your body and mind have been through a lot. Taking time for yourself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary.
- Practice techniques. Deep breathing, stepping outside for fresh air, or listening to music can sometimes take the edge off those anxious moments, or taking yourself out of a situation because it’s making you feel more anxious.
- Celebrate small wins. Whether it’s going out for coffee without panicking or just making it through a day without checking your bag a hundred times.
Living with a stoma doesn’t mean living without anxiety, but it does mean you’ll discover resilience you didn’t know you had. It’s a learning process, and some days are harder than others, but that’s okay. Managing anxiety isn’t about being perfect, it’s about finding what helps you.
And remember, you’re not alone in this.
